


Hold Me Tight

by The_Scavenger



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, But also do, F/M, confessions are the best things to write, dramatic i love you's, end of the world sad vibes, get your tissues babes, its a tear jerker, please dont cry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-29
Updated: 2020-02-29
Packaged: 2021-02-28 05:14:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,991
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22948399
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Scavenger/pseuds/The_Scavenger
Summary: Based on the song "If The World Was Ending."
Relationships: Rey & Ben Solo, Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren
Comments: 3
Kudos: 16





	Hold Me Tight

Ben wasn’t even paying attention to the news when it went public. He bustled about his apartment, distracted by the worries of potentially burning his lunch. His toast was burning, his coffee was starting to get cold and he didn’t bother looking at the pile of mail building on his kitchen island. “Alert. Alert,” A mechanical voice echoed into his living room.

“We interrupt your programming. This is a national emergency.”

The annoyingly familiar weather storm alert pulled his attention, but what worried him was that he could also hear it above his floor, below and around. Everyone’s televisions were broadcasting this..?

“The National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration has detected a significant environmental event that will impact the greater United States. You and your loved ones should seek the nearest fallout shelter immediately. Please stand by for further area updates.”

The screen went black.

**I was distracted and in traffic**

**I didn't feel it when the earthquake happened**

Ben’s blood went cold. Fuck, this was actually happening? The fallout shelters scattered around the city was just a precaution months ago. Were people going to take this seriously? There’s no way an entire city could fit in those bunkers. He recalled seeing them on the news when the first and only environmental threat was near the city. The mayor decided to construct poorly developed “safe houses” to appease the worried citizens. However, most of the city (and the world) tossed the fear aside like a usual storm that would soon be forgotten. A cry and scream could be heard in his building. A chill went down his spine. Grabbing his phone, Ben went to message the first person he could think of. He ignored the shaking in his hands, fear of the inevitable closer than he ever thought. He just wanted to see her.

**But it really got me thinkin', were you out drinkin'?**

**Were you in the living room, chillin', watchin' television?**

Wait. Should he text her? Should he call her? They haven’t spoken in almost a year. Hell, the last time they actually spoke face to face, she was returning his hoodie. Her favorite hoodie. She always loved how much it smelled like him, and he loved when she wore it. God, he missed her. He missed her hugs and how she made him feel so relaxed. The stress of life was nonexistent when she was with him, and his heart would still flutter when she walked in the room. They still acted like lovesick teenagers sometimes, even after their three year relationship. Which is why it hurt so much when they ended it. What was she doing right now? Surely she must’ve heard these news too. She was usually home now, and she could’ve seen the report as well. Was she alone? Was she scared? Of course she was probably scared, he was fucking terrified. He didn’t want her to be alone, he didn’t want to be alone. He thought about visiting his mom and dad’s graves, but it wouldn’t matter. He would see them soon enough. Who would want to spend their last minutes of life in a cemetery?

**It's been a year now, think I've figured out how**

**How to let you go and let communication die out**

Ben could still hear cries from the building, but now there were prayers, and he heard others hurry down the main staircase. The sunny day outside continued on, and birds chirped away, unaware of their imminent doom in who knows how long. He looked at his phone, no new messages. Ben was a loner, he would admit that. His only other friends were because of Rey. They would tag along on dates or go to parties together. Poe even spent the night at his place a few times and the boys would go to games together. After the break-up, they all kind of disappeared, and Ben didn’t blame them. He missed them. He missed her. He missed their drunken confessions of love at the bar, Poe, Finn and Rose laughing around them. Not a care in the world as he held her close to his heart. He missed their predictable and routine mornings of kisses, coffee and witty discussions on the way out the door to work. He missed their arguments, the late night screams turned to sobs turned to moans among his sheets at 3 a.m.

**I know, you know, we know you weren't**

**Down for forever and it's fine I know, you know, we know we weren't**

**Meant for each other and it's fine**

He watched the screen, re-reading their last messages to one another. It was almost like any minute he expected her to call, her face surprising him on his home screen. Tears brimmed as the reality of what was happening settled in. The potential future he had imagined was gone and Ben choked back a sob. Everything he ever wanted to do would cease to exist, he never got to see the world, get married or have his own children. All these things he could’ve done with Rey, cut short by life itself. Ben: You don’t have to respond, but know that I’m always here for you for anything. Anything. That message held more meaning now that it had then, and Ben prayed Rey would understand that. He would do anything to try and make her happy again, for the last few hours they had to live, he was hers. Even if she didn’t want him. He wiped his arm across his wet eyes, not caring that he looked like a weeping mess. Then, at the corner of his eye, he saw it. Adrenaline swept down his arms and through his body at the three dot indicator that appeared across his last message. She was thinking about him! She was writing to him! Did she want to see him? Why else would she be messaging him now? Then as quick as they appeared, the dots were gone.

“Fuck.”

In a heartbeat, Ben was out his door.

**But if the world was ending, you'd come over, right?**

**You'd come over and you'd stay the night**

Not even remembering where his feet took him, Ben found himself outside hurrying towards her home. The sight of the public only made him walk faster, not wanting to waste another minute away from her in this state of chaos. Cars swerved down the streets, people running around him, some carrying bags, others carrying children. It was as disastrous as those end-of-the-world movies Ben had seen, only this time, it was actually happening. The sky was still blue and the trees gave off a vibrant, peaceful green in the summer day. The crowds and shouting in the streets however, brought him back to the realization that in a few hours, they would all be nothing. An argument broke out over a vehicle and people began to get physical. Ben continued on. He just pushed his way down the city streets. Avoiding any conflict was a priority for him, hoping he would make it to her in one piece. The feeling of being in her arms again felt so good to him, like he was coming home. Her place wasn’t always clean, and she always had the TV volume up too loud, or let dishes in the sink too long, but it always felt like he could come and go as he wanted and she would always give him a kiss hello or goodbye. When Ben was home with Rey, he felt wanted. And even though he only saw those three dots, it was enough for him to hope he still was.

**Would you love me for the hell of it?**

**All our fears would be irrelevant**

The last thing Ben wanted to think about was their break-up. None of that mattered anymore, at least to him it didn’t. He continued to think about her, blocking out the horrors of the world around him. Her smile replaced his fear, and he couldn’t help but laugh at the time she slipped in front of his apartment after a snow storm. The pizza she picked up was okay, but she had a nasty bruise on her hip for days. Soon there would be no more pizza nights, no more weekend trips, no more surprise birthday parties, no more cuddles in the dark. At least, when they broke up, there was still the chance he could have that again, with Rey or someone else. But now, Ben realized there was no other person he wanted to spend his life with but her.

**If the world was ending, you'd come over, right?**

**The sky'd be falling and I'd hold you tight**

His feet propelled him on the corner of her street. He could see the top of her building, higher than the others around it. The tears began to fall again as he hurried to the entrance. The feeling of seeing her, being around her, holding her was enough to break him down forever. She was intoxicating and he couldn’t get enough. He wrapped his hand around the railing and heaved himself, two steps at a time to her floor. He left his house for the last time, he breathed outside air for the final time, and he would see no other face but hers. Almost panting, her front door sent chills down his spine. He was saying good-bye to everything else, but was about to greet his whole world.

**And there wouldn't be a reason why**

**We would even have to say goodbye**

Ben’s fist shook, him knocking on her door could hardly be heard over the sound of the blood rushing around his brain.

**If the world was ending, you'd come over, right? Right?**

**If the world was ending, you'd come over, right? Right?**

**~~~**

Her eyes only widened at the screen in front of her. The black, and eerie alert had proven that all the storms, disasters, and unexplainable occurrences that had been happening were warnings of what was to come. And now it was here.

**I tried to imagine your reaction**

**It didn't scare me when the earthquake happened**

She fiddled with her phone, her toes curling under her on the couch. It was flooded with heartfelt messages from her friends, saying good-bye, that they loved her and hoped she was happy wherever she was.

“Peanut, I will never forget how much light you brought into my life. You helped me live with passion and found why I was put on this Earth. You will always be my Rey of sunshine. I love you.”

Finn. She just saw him yesterday when they went to the gym together.

“Rey, you are the best friend anyone could ask for. You have lived a life worth living and deserve every breath. You saw the best in me and there are no words to describe how much I will miss you, miss everyone, and miss life. I will see you soon amongst the stars. All my love.”

Rose. They were just planning a girls day next week, with shopping, lunch and deciding who’s house they would crash at.

“Hey sweetheart, sure you heard the news… Enjoy the time you have, you are a great gal and I hope you are surrounded by those who matter. God Bless You.”

Poe. She just helped him move some new furniture in last week with her truck, and they laughed after she hit her knee on his coffee table.

_Surrounded by those who matter…_

Who did matter? As much as she loved the messages, and responded with equal love and admiration, there was only one message, one person that mattered. She wiped away her tears, realizing she hadn’t cried this hard since her parents passed away. Rey was only nine then, but the pain of sobbing at the funeral were as clear as the day outside. She pulled up his messages, never having the courage to delete them. His face on his contact was comforting to see, and she scrolled through their old conversations. Shivers went down her arms, a chill in the room and all Rey wanted was to be held. Her apartment felt colder now, with the rush of everything that happened, she didn’t want to be alone. Her kitchen was still dirty with dishes from this morning, she even had a load of laundry in the basement that she had to get later. None of it mattered, all that mattered was that she wanted him. She noticed the picture frame by her door. It was knocked down one night when Ben couldn’t keep his hands off her after dinner. They didn’t make it to the bedroom, the passion too evident in his kisses on their way home. She had felt so safe in his arms, his heartbeat loud in her ears when he held her close, filling her up with love atop her kitchen counter.

**But it really got me thinkin', the night we went drinkin'**

**Stumbled in the house and didn't make it past the kitchen**

Fear suddenly spiked in her and she began to panic, the realization of dying hitting her. In a hurry, she could do the only thing she wanted to do. His last message made her insides warm, remembering how much he cared that she was okay.

She wasn’t now.

“Please come over. I’m scared and I need to see you. This is all so stupid and..”

No, no, no she can’t text him! She erased the message and sighed. What was he doing right now? Was he at home? Was he working? She tried not to remember his schedule that was practically engrained in her memory. She knew he was probably home for lunch, so he definitely saw what happened. Maybe he went to the cemetery, or maybe he is out trying to find a way to escape out of the city. Rey didn’t want to be selfish, but what she hoped was that he was thinking of her the same way she thought of him. The feeling of pulling him into her, and taking in all she was made her mind hazy and her heart flutter. He made her feel drunk just by touching her hand, or looking at her a certain way.

**Ah, it's been a year now, think I've figured out how**

**How to think about you without it rippin' my heart out**

She didn’t need to see what was happening outside, too scared to see the sight. Standing up from her couch, Rey walked around her home. The trinkets and junk she had now had so much meaning. Her kitchen tools that she bought over the years, the photos of her friends, the wobbly shelf she fixed herself held books that helped her learn so much. She had some plants scattered about, the greenery making her home full of warmth and life.

**And I know, you know, we know you weren't**

**Down for forever and it's fine I know, you know, we know we weren't**

**Meant for each other and it's fine**

And every. Single. Fucking. Thing. Reminded her of him. The tears flowed freely, and Rey imagined the thousands of memories she had of him. Their mornings at her dining table, their movie nights on her couch. There was even a useless ceramic pigeon thing on her shelf that he got her after a bad day at work to cheer her up. The empty feeling of dying alone frightened her, and she wrapped her cardigan around herself to try and feel better. It was numbing for her. Everyone knew the question: If you only had 24 hours to live, what would you do? People would usually say travel or do something crazy. She didn’t know what she wanted to do. Rey always thought it silly to wonder about useless things like that, focusing more on the now and trying to work to support herself. What would she do?

**But if the world was ending, you'd come over, right?**

**You'd come over and you'd stay the night**

She would be with Ben. She would confess how much she missed him, how she wanted him back in any way she could. She would forgive him, or beg for his forgiveness, whatever he wanted. Running her hands through his locks, she would kiss him to the point of exhaustion, hoping he could feel her love through the breathless confessions. She blinked back tears but they continued to fall. She would go on and on about everything she loved about him. His handsome face, his gentleness, his desire to help others, but also his stubbornness to prove he was right, his anger issues, and his need for approval were just some of the things Rey loved about him. If he wanted, she would re-tell all their funny stories and make him laugh, desperate to see his smile, to hear his laugh. When she first met him, he was a dark, brooding, man. As she slowly pulled him out of his own mind, Rey noticed how beautiful his smile was. And when she heard him laugh for the first time, she was hooked. Hell, she would even go on about how she fell on the ice after she picked up their pizza for movie night. It all seemed so silly then, to worry or be embarrassed about that kind of thing. But now, Rey would give anything to relive that moment. If she could go back, she would pull a giggling Ben into the snow with her and kiss him like she never had before.

**Would you love me for the hell of it?**

**All our fears would be irrelevant If the world was ending, you'd come over, right?**

**Sky'd be falling while I hold you tight**

Rey would do anything Ben wanted, as long as she was with him. By his side, for the rest of their lives, no matter how short that was. She missed how he smelled, how her felt against her, with his strong arms protecting her from the world she fought so hard against. She was strong, they both knew that. But when he saw her nightmare nights for the first time, she thought he would stop calling, stop talking and she would have to be by herself all over again. It came as a shock when he stayed, and even offered to stay up to wake her before it got too worse again.

**No, there wouldn't be a reason why**

**We would even have to say goodbye**

Eventually, the nightmares came less and less. And Rey would wake in his arms, wrapped up and protected. He would rub his thumb against her, as if saying, “I’m here, I’ve got you.”

He was her dream from the nightmares of reality.

**If the world was ending, you'd come over, right?**

**You'd come over, right? You'd come over, you'd come over, you'd come over, right?**

She drew out the sounds of the television behind her. The alert continued on for an hour and Rey knew there was nothing more to do. She was about to crawl into bed with music and hope for a quick death when..

_Knock knock knock._

**I know, you know, we know you weren't**

**Down for forever and it's fine I know, you know, we know we weren't**

**Meant for each other and it's fine**

She stood still for a moment, straining to hear. Did someone just knock? Who was knocking on her door now? Should she even answer? She attempted to wipe her eyes, trying to look presentable during the end of the world. She opened the door slowly to see who stood on the other side.

**But if the world was ending, you'd come over, right?**

**You'd come over and you'd stay the night**

She huffed, struggling to breathe, sobs taking over at the sight of him. Ben rushed through the threshold into her home, arms scooping her into his chest and lifting her off the ground. His heartbeat was still pounding from the nervousness of seeing her beautiful face once again.

His breath hot and sweet against her cheek and he whispered, “I’m here, I’ve got you.”

Afraid he would pull away or even disappear, Rey dug her nails into his back, grabbing him for dear life. Crying into his shoulder, she apologized for everything and anything. He carried her until he collapsed from emotion into the living room, his own tears falling into her sweater and hair, dampening her locks. He held her shaking body in his lap, feeling like they were both where they were supposed to be at the end of it all. They apologized and cried, shaking with emotion. Happiness to be in each other’s arms again, with fear of the unknown and inevitable. They tried not to think of how much time they wasted with the fighting. Had they known what was to happen, every fight, every argument was nothing compared to their love and need to be together.

**Would you love me for the hell of it?**

**All our fears would be irrelevant**

Eventually they became quiet, silent tears dripped on her carpet. Their hands wrapped in the others, their legs entwined, never letting go. The TV was on but muted, soft music played from her stereo instead.

Ben spoke first, “Do you remember,” his voice was groggy and wet from crying, “when you made me run out in the rain to get your phone after you dropped it out the window on the freeway?”

She erupted into laughter, a sound that he could hear forever, “I didn’t drop it, it was the wind.”

Ben rolled his eyes, “Uh huh.”

“What about when you dared me to wear that bunny suit so we would win the costume contest!” Rey exclaimed.

“Well we did win!”

They talked and giggled, the reminder of what was happening outside forgotten. The two were too busy enjoying each others presence, catching up that they didn’t notice the distant bright white light grow brighter on the horizon.

**If the world was ending, you'd come over, right?**

**The sky'd be falling while I hold you tight**

“Are you still having nightmares?” Ben mumbled, rubbing his fingers between a lock. Her hair still smelled like her citrus shampoo, and the sun casting light on her was a refreshing sight for his eyes.

“Sometimes..,” Rey said, “but this makes up for all of it.”

She pulled his hand from their grip, kissing his palm.

“I’m sorry. I know I shou-“

“Shh. None of that matters now. I’m just happy you’re here."

Ben smiled, “Me too.”

A vibration from the earth began to shake her home, but they didn’t notice.

Ben started joking about the infamous pizza night, Rey begged him to stop, planting endless kisses to make him shut up.

“I also heard you hit your knee at Poe’s! What a klutz you are!”

“I knew he told you! What a tattletale!”

**No, there wouldn't be a reason why**

**We would even have to say goodbye**

There was so much love and hope in Ben and Rey’s eyes, they forgot everything that was happening. Ben laughed until tears of sorrow turned into tears of laughter, his stomach ached as Rey told him how she and Rose got off the wrong train stop a few days ago. They were one again, the back of Rey’s mind wondering when their wedding would be, while Ben had thought if he wanted their child to have her hair or his. They had all the time in the world to think about it.

**If the world was ending, you'd come over, right?**

**You'd come over, you'd come over, you'd come over, right?**

It was fast. It was quiet. Their gaze fixed on each other, two souls in love, the bright white light non-existent to them. It shook her home in a millisecond, their smiles forever in the others memory.

**If the world was ending, you'd come over, right?**


End file.
